Tuesday 20 December 2011

P & O Azura Dec 4th to 17th 2011

Well, it has been a wonderful five weeks working from home, being able to take my boy Sam to school most days and have my eldest son Tom working with me on the tour. I have enjoyed the tour very much and a massive thank you to all who came to support us, we went everywhere from the Grand Theatre Swansea to Theatre Colwyn Colwyn Bay to The Borough Theatre Abergaveny to The Torch Theatre in Milford Haven and everywhere in-between, I can’t even look at the fuel bills! I hope you have enjoyed the video clips on the blog, we had some real fun times!

I had a car from Executive Cars Wales with Billy driving pick me up at 5am yesterday morning to take me to Gatwick and my non stop flight of 9hrs to beautiful St. Lucia in the Caribbean where I stayed in a hotel and later joined the P&O Azura. The hotel was nice and I met some really nice people at the bar, also the Chief Officer from Azura was there, we are joining the ship together in about an hour. On the flight out here I sat next to a lovely couple Mark and Catharine, we chatted away for the last 2 hours which helped as there is nothing worse than those last 2 hours waiting to land after a long haul flight, Mark is a retired Banker and Catherine is a Yoga Teacher and they are walkers too, it was good to talk to them and it has sparked something in me as I want to get back into my running this cruise. Thanks guys it was lovely to meet you, have fun in St. Lucia.

I am now waiting for my taxi to take me to the ship so see you later.

I got onboard around 11am and what a great welcome, it’s so nice to be back with P&O and indeed Azura, I was met by the crew manager and taken to the crew office to sign ship formalities then I went along to the cruise directors office and had a fantastic welcome, my old pal Neil Oliver is cruise director and we had a good old catch up and we have made a date to have dinner one evening.


I have been given a beautiful junior suite and it has a huge balcony so that will be nice to sit out there in the sun. My show is day after tomorrow in the Playhouse Theatre so I have some time to rest up; I have a watertight door induction in 15mins so I will see you later.

Well that was induction 1. Water tight doors, splash doors, fire, health and safety.
I had a nice chat to some people from Carmarthen in the pub on the way back to my cabin, there are loads on from Wales so I am looking forward to meeting them later.
We sail in a bit for Dominica, now that’s a lovely Island, Frank Bruno’s family comes from there by the way. We have a day at sea tomorrow so that will be nice, then the next day it’s my show.



Good morning: Looks like we haven’t moved from the shores of St. Lucia? The time is 6.50am and the sun is coming up over the Pitons and it looks like its going to be a beautiful day, I have taken a few photos but my camera lens keeps steaming up with the condensation as it’s air conditioning inside and as soon as I open the balcony door the heat outside is totally the opposite, bit like opening an oven door, it’s around 22degs already, it is strange being so hot with Christmas around the corner, I don’t think I could do Christmas here or anywhere other than home really, the last time I was on a cruise ship in December was 1982 in the South Pacific on SS Oriana (have a look on my cruising page to see the old girl SS Oriana) she was my first ship.

Today is Tuesday 6th December and I shall be here on Azura until 17th December where I shall be flying home to Heathrow from Beef Island Virgin Islands via San Juan and Madrid, but until then I must try and relax, no excuse really I’m in the Caribbean, have a fab suite and I’m not working till tomorrow night, so come on Doyley get your backside into gear and go for a nice walk around the deck and find out why we didn’t leave St. Lucia. See you later.

I had a good walk/run around deck 7 as we sailed away from St. Lucia past the famous Pitons and out to sea en route to the Island of Dominica.


I enjoyed a healthy breakfast of fruit, sunflower seeds and plain yogurt with honey all washed down with a fresh orange juice…lovely!

We had some extra entertainment laid on by a school of Dolphins and flying fish of the port bow…where was my blinkin camera? The weather is ever so hot but quite overcast so I’m enjoying an old rom-com Notting Hill, it was a favorite film of Marie and I when it came out and it is making me smile!
I’m meeting some people from Carmarthen in the pub at 12noon for a chat and a pint and later meeting up with my old mate Bars Manager Michael Shamley or “Sham” as we call him, Sham is a great bloke and loves to tell jokes and he loves hearing them to, I remember once we were on Arcadia in the crew bar and we laughed so hard we nearly passed out, great times on a great ship, Arcadia will always be a firm favorite of mine, I made some great friends on there and Trevor Conley the Executive Chef or “Big Man” as we call him is one of the nicest guys you will ever meet and what a chef, he used to teach me loads about cooking, KISS as he kept telling me which means “Keep It Simple Stupid” a great Chef, even Marco Pierre White rates him highly!

I had nice pint in the Broadie’s the pub onboard with my mate from Carmarthen and a lovely tapas lunch in the Glass House, which is a trendy wine bar on deck 7.
I fell asleep on the settee around 8pm and woke up at midnight, I got myself to bed and woke up this morning at 5.45am in time to enjoy Azura sailing into Dominica, have a look at the photos. I had a cooked breakfast for a change and didn’t really enjoy it, I must stick to the fruit, it’s much nicer!
I have just finished working on my show for tonight, I’m doing it much like I have been doing on Celebrity as I have only one night to do this cruise, so a mix of the two shows. My shows tonight are in the huge Playhouse Theatre 890 seats at 7pm, 8.30pm and 10.30pm so a long night ahead, I have been so tired every night since I’ve been here due to the 4 hour time difference so I hope I can stay awake tonight, I’m sure I will. I’m going to take a stroll now around the little town here in Dominica, I have been here before quite a few times so I know where to go, Dominica is a rain forest Island so I know it could pour down at any moment, but its so hot and humid its 28degs today and Christmas is 2 weeks away. I rang Marie this morning and she tells me our Sam has his cough back…I can’t believe it, he suffers so much with a cough, I do hope it goes away by Christmas.

I had a lovely walk around, have a look at these photos, it is a basic life style out here to say the least but a happy life non the less, people look after each other here, making sure their friends are ok and have everything they need, quite refreshing really, a real community spirit!



I had a phone call form the Entertainments Office and I had the shock of my life, an old mate from 1996 Oriana days is onboard Simon Jason, what a lovely surprise, he came up to see me and couldn’t believe the photos of Tom and he didn’t know about Sam, we went for lunch together and had a good catch up, what a nice man he is, we were thick as thieves in those days, we went around the world together.

I have 1hr 30mins to go now until my rehearsal, so see you later.


I had a good rehearsal, the sound man John is very good and has given me what I want in my monitors but my voice is a bit shaky, oh well once I’m on I’m sure it will all be fine, the musical director is Andy Pickering and the band are ace, Andy worked with my son Tom last year in panto with Sam Kane and Linda Lusardi so it was nice to meet him although we have worked together ages ago.
I am on in 45mins so best I go now and get ready…see you later!

Just back from 7pm show, well I won’t lie to you I found the start a tad bumpy, all my fault as the audience were fab, I just couldn’t get a rhythm going, then I went into the married couple routine and it started then to flow and everyone was up at the end, so 8.30pm next and that’s in 30mins…quick cup of tea now.

The 8.30pm show couldn’t have gone any better, loved it because it all flowed lovely, loads of ad libing and having fun, there’s loads on from Carmarthen…must be a trip!!! See you after the next show, which is in 20mins time, long night with 3 shows!

Yes the 3rd show was a good one, we even sang Silent Night, Neil Oliver the cruise director was pleased and so was I. I had a nice drink and a chat with Neil and Simon Jason in the Glass House after the show then with Bars Manager Sham in the pub afterwards. When I got to bed I was so tired I fell asleep as soon as my head touched the pillow.




Today we are in St. Vincent, the weather this trip has been awful really, it’s just overcast, dull but hot and sticky, so many on the ship are fed up with the weather as they have spent a fortune getting here and were hoping for some nice winter sun before Christmas, but it’s not to be, that’s one thing we can do nothing about…the weather!

Tonight I have been invited for drinks and nibbles with Captain Paul Brown, Executive Purser Cathy Jones and Cruise Director Neil, so I’ll be in very good company, I do hope it’s not a formal night…suit and tie etc!!!

Welcome to Barbados. The sun is finally out and it is hot hot hot! I was up at 6am and watched as we tied up alongside. I had a lovely little hour at the Executive Pursers Cabin with Captain, Neil Oliver and Simon Jason, we seem to be the old gang on here as we go way back. Well, I have already had a couple of hours in the sun and I’m now waiting for Theo and Sham to call for me as we are going up the road for a couple of beers and some lunch on the beach, it could be the Boat Yard which is a famous haunt with the ships crew and they do a mean spot of lunch too…and cold freezing beer to wash it down with. I do hope this weather is here to stay now.

Great lunch and the sea was lovely, I had to just jump in, it was so warm and the beer was ever so cold…ah the Caribbean! The last time I was at the Boat Yard it was with Marie and she was pregnant with Samuel, we sat on that same beach, Marie loves Barbados.

We are now on another cruise as we have turned around in Barbados, so another 3000 people have embarked and we are off again around the Caribbean with another cruise director Laura Bennison (or Bennie as well call her) and another Captain Keith Dowds who happens to be a good golfer too, I wonder if we play somewhere this cruise!

Good morning and what a lovely morning it is, the time is 6.30am and the sun is now coming up (nice photo)




today we are at sea and it’s Sunday so I think I’ll go to church this morning, every Sunday when we are at sea P&O have always held a church service and it’s usually the Captain or the Deputy Captain that holds the service, today it’s Deputy Captain Simon Terry who only a couple of days ago was promoted to Captain and his first ship as Master is going to be Oceana. Simon is a lovely man and he has his wife and little 2yr old on with him, so he and his family have much to look forward to…well done Sir!

This cruise we are going to Curacao and Aruba in the Dutch Antilles, Grand Turk, Tortola, St. Maarten, St. Kitts, St. Lucia, Grenada and back to Barbados, I however will be flying home from Tortola via San Juan and Madrid.

The sun is shining out on my balcony so definitely going to sit in it today, the weather has been awful back home.

Marie sent me some photos of our Sam dressed as a star in the school Nativity Play, oh my goodness, that made me cry a bit I have to tell you, its not easy being away from your loved ones…but I never complain because I am the one doing this job, many would love to be in my shoes.

I had really nice early Sunday morning sitting in the sun on the balcony and then decided to have my breakfast on the balcony too, best cup of coffee in ages. I’m of to church in a bit then off to the pub for a pre Sunday lunch pint with Sham the Bars Manager. This afternoon is a sunbathing day without a doubt. I have read through my script of “Of Men and Mice” and I love it, I can’t wait to start rehearsals with it, it’s a long way away I know but I am going to work on it as much as I can in preparation for it. Watch this space I suppose!

I had every intention of going to see comedian Jed Fry tonight and have dinner with Sham, but once again I have stayed in and watched TV? Jed told me earlier that the comic last night had done quite a few lines that I do in my show, so I will now have to re-think my act, it’ll be fine, I’ll work something out! They have a lot of comedian’s on here so we are bound to clash now and then. Tomorrow we are in the beautiful Dutch Island of Curacao and it looks like it’s going to be another hot sunny day. Good Night!

Good Morning! Oh no, where’s the sun? Not again! We are now in Curacao and its cloudy and humid just like it was last week, oh well it might brighten up later this afternoon, to be honest it’s not for me it’s the guests I feel sorry for, it’s a long way to come in December for no sun.
I have spoke with Marie and she tells me Sam fell and had a nose bleed, he fell in the living room dancing around going crazy dancing to “Move Like Jagger” I did laugh, not for long but I did laugh!

I also spoke to my mate comedian Jeff Stevenson; he joins the Azura later this cruise so I will miss him.
I have had a great day out with my old pal Entertainment Officer Simon Jason, we went to a beach and it poured with rain for most of the time but we has a few beers and laughed over old times for the whole afternoon, Simon and I go back to 1996 on Oriana together where we sailed out of Hong Kong for the World Cruise, what a great day. We sail from Curacao in 40mins for Aruba another heaven on earth place so see you tomorrow!


Hello…still here, what’s wrong with me, I have Azura at my feet with loads going on and look at me, I’m staying in again, I have just had some room service and now watching TV, I just can’t be bothered to get all dolled up and go out. Good Night!

Today we are in Aruba, I woke up at 6.50am and watched the ship being tied up alongside and then rang Marie and she told me the news from home, my very good pal Gary Lovini was on TV last night it was a documentary about the 1986 New Faces Finalists and where they are now, I can’t wait to see it on the planner when I get home, also the news that Little Mix had won the X Factor, Sam finishes school today for the Christmas Holidays (that seems a bit early).
I have my show tonight in the Playhouse at 7pm, 8.30pm & 10.30pm so I have just finished sorting the act out, a comic has already been on and has done some similar lines so I have to be on my guard tonight!

It’s 8.30am here now and 12.30pm at home so my day is only just beginning, so a shower and some nice breakfast me thinks!

I am so bored today, I’m just hanging around waiting to go to rehearsals, I’m always a bit odd on my show day, it’s 11.20am and I’m sat in Costa Coffee on the ships deck 5 enjoying the biggest cup of coffee in the world, Mal Pope would be proud of me, have you been to see Cappuccino Girls in Swansea yet…I haven’t, I hope I get a chance to go soon!

I have 30mins to my rehearsal and sound check; I have spent the afternoon watching “The Office” Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant are geniuses, I have laughed my head off yet again, its like watching “Faulty Towers” you can watch it over and over again…brilliant!

Its now 15th December….it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas…well if you can call white sand beaches, reggae music blasting out from bars along the beach, blue skies, turquoise waters and a Christmas Tree!!! Today we are in Grand Turk and what a beautiful place, I haven’t been here before so I can’t wait to wonder ashore and explore!



What a beautiful place, take a look at these photos, words fail me. We were in with the Carnival Liberty so come the afternoon there were thousands of people around the place but do you know what, it didn’t matter, this is one awesome place on planet earth…Grand Turk!

I have my rehearsal and sound check in 3hrs as I am back on tonight for 3 shows then tomorrow I pack and the next day its Tortola and I fly home for Christmas!
My rehearsal is in 30mins time and as I was relaxing thinking of tonight’s show there was a loud knock on my door, it was Wayne Denton, he was clearly upset and very sunburnt, he came in and told me that he had lost his wedding ring, he had been swimming in the sea and when he came out the wedding ring was gone, he spent 3hrs on his hands and knees searching for it in the sand and trying to look for it in the sea, the poor man is devastated, he doesn’t know how to tell his wife, they got married in March this year in the Ukraine in a Catholic Church. He asked me if I had any dollars on me, I only had $20 so I gave him that and he’s going back to the spot where he lost the ring and he’s going to buy some goggles to search underwater, I tried to tell him that it would be like searching for a needle in a hay stack but he wouldn’t listen. He has “his” rehearsal in an hour as he is on tonight in Manhattan Bar doing his tribute to John Denver, poor man he’s in a bad way!
Good morning…it’s my last day on Azura and this boy is going home tomorrow, I’m outta here!
Last night my show went great, even the 7pm was great, I had a fab night but I was really tired afterwards so just a couple with Wayne Denton in the pub, his shows went great too so we were both pleased with ourselves.

Today I shall be packing and really counting down the hours to go home, one more sleep for me. Tonight Cruise Director Benne and Deputy Cruise Director Matt are treating to a meal in the Glass House so that will be really nice.
I had a pint with Graham Clarke who I go back an awful long time with, he used to be a pro racing driver; he’s here with his partner Beverly, lovely people. Well, I’m 75% packed now and can’t wait to just go home now, it’s a bit rough the sea today and the weather is windy and partly cloudy, still warm though!

I had a wonderful meal with Benne, Sham and Al the Glass House Manager, it really is a truly magnificent wine bar, its won Best Bar at Sea voted by someone or other. I had one drink in the crew bar before bed and up nice and early and the long day and night starts.

I got to Tortola airport and flew in a 9 seater plane to San Jaun, wow, what a great flight, I sat right behind the pilot, amazing, now that is what you call proper flying. I’m now sat on the plane to Madrid and this is where I will sleep tonight, well when I say sleep I mean more get irritable for 8hrs, then I have a 2 hr wait in Madrid and my final flight home to Heathrow where Executive Cars will be waiting for me www.excecutivecarswales.co.uk to take me home to my family who I have been missing so very much, Sam is very excited for Christmas and so am I.

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